Saturday, January 31, 2009

My WeAkly Advice (1st edition)

My WeAkly Advice:

Hello folks:

I’m starting a NEW spot and I’m calling it “My WeAkly advice. I’ll use the Internet and all the good sites out there.

All to the Glory of our Lord and Savior Jesus.

Here’s my 1st advice to my prodigal son, John.

John, I still love you, I just don’t like you. You can forget about ever calling me your father anymore. If you come to your senses and allow me to have a loving relationship with my only grandchild, I’ll allow you back into my life.

Our wedding photo has replaced your wedding photo with Kim. You and Kim are NON EXISTENT. You have been written out of my last will and testimony. You should have a copy on file. The witnessed will is on file in my bedroom. I’ll scan it also and make a password web page.

My next advice to John & Kim is to learn about the fruits of the spirit in the Bible. It seems to me that the word FORGIVE is in there somewhere. Do you NOT understand?

SHAME ON YOU TWO!

I am responsible for my actions. Madeline is more of an adult than you two. Get some help!

Here ends my 1st bit of advice.

My

Optionetics

Optionetics 2-day Class Confirmation

Myron Holter
916432
mholter@cox.net

Dear Myron,

Congratulations! You are confirmed to attend the Optionetics 2-day Class coming to St. Louis, MO on 2/3/2009 and 2/4/2009 at the location below. We have recently revamped the class, and now is a great time for you to attend.

Hilton St. Louis Airport
10330 Natural Bridge Road
St. Louis, MO 63134

Please contact the hotel at 314-426-5500 for information regarding room rates, parking and directions, and click here for a map.

WHAT TO BRING:
Please be prepared to show a valid picture ID, such as a driver's license or a passport during registration.

Please consider bringing a jacket or a sweater. Most meeting rooms are kept at a room temperature of 65 degrees Fahrenheit.

Although we provide supplemental handouts during the class, you should also consider bringing a notepad and pen/pencil for your own note taking.

Due to our copyright, recording devices are strictly prohibited.

Day One Schedule:
The registration will begin at approximately 8:00 a.m. with the class actually beginning at 9:00 a.m. Although the class is scheduled to end at 5:00 p.m., we highly recommend that you stay for our optional session on trading tools presented from 5 p.m. to 6 p.m.

Here is some of what will be covered:
Essential keys to successful trading
Examining the power of leverage
Using simple chart analysis to identify winning trades
Going beyond the basics with vertical spreads Understanding market direction
Spotting volatile markets and using them to your advantage
and much more!










Day Two Schedule:
The doors will open at 7:00 a.m. with the class actually beginning at 8:00 a.m. and ending at approximately 4:00 p.m

Here is some of what will be covered:
Locating winning trades
Money-making tactics for profiting in sideways markets
Industry indicators that can give you an edge
Placing a trade
Creating a trading plan
Collars and Married Puts
Highlighted Topic










Please feel free to contact our customer service department should you have any questions regarding the class. Our representatives are available by telephone, email and live online chat from 7:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. Pacific Time.

Telephone: 888-366-8264 ext. 5
Email: seminars@optionetics.com
Live Chat:


Once again, congratulations on your decision to take control of your financial future by joining the Optionetics family; we look forward to working with you at the class!

Best Regards,


The Optionetics Team

Our Referral Rewards Program rewards both you and your referrals! Learn more about this incredible program by calling 866-337-8553 or clicking on the button below!



* Please note that all seminar cancellation notices must be received at least 72 hours prior to the seminar or you will be charged $500.



Please read our legal notices and disclaimers
Optionetics, Inc.
255 Shoreline Drive, Suite 100, Redwood City, CA 94065
2008 Optionetics Inc. All rights reserved.

Friday, January 30, 2009

The Whys of Men

The Whys of Men


1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX? (because they are plugged into a
genius)




2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)

3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?

(they don't stop to ask directions)

4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)
(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)


5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)

6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?

(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)

7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?

(don't know.....it never happened)

( C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)

And the personal favorite:

8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?

(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)

Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your
heart...Then you are just an old sour fart !
One for the ladies

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What
setting do I use on the washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma.'

And they say blondes are dumb...
-----------------------------------------------
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,
'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'
The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'

-----------------------------------------------------------

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of
the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed
the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
-----------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor

-----------------------------------------------------------
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience
for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to
death.
AMEN


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-
Q : Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
-----------------------------------------------
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and
calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

-----------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.'

-----------------------------------------------------------
Send this to at least five bright, funny women you know and make their day!


And send this to five bright men who have enough sense of humor to take it!

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Jock itch (from DH)



My sentiments exactly ... Maybe it will fix my jock itch?

Two Woodpeckers (from Brother Dale)

Subject: TWO WOODPECKERS


TWO WOODPECKERS



A Mexican woodpecker and a Canadian woodpecker were in Mexico arguing about which place had the toughest trees. The Mexican woodpecker claimed Mexico had a tree that no woodpecker could peck



The Canadian woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem. The Mexican woodpecker was amazed.



The Canadian woodpecker then challenged the Mexican woodpecker to peck a tree in Canada that was absolutely 'impeckable' (a term frequently used by woodpeckers ). The Mexican woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge.



The two flew to Canada where the Mexican woodpecker successfully pecked the so-called 'impeckable' tree almost without breaking a sweat.



Both woodpeckers were now terribly confused. How is it that the Canadian woodpecker was able to peck the Mexican tree, and the Mexican woodpecker was able to peck the Canadian tree, yet neither was able to peck the tree in their own country.



After much woodpecker pondering, they both came to the same conclusion: Apparently your pecker gets harder when you're away from home.

Monday, January 26, 2009

MoM's Birthday 11/1/2008



I am in the process of downloading the images from my mother's 95th birthday party

Myron,
#5

Frank Williams


My caiitopeka.org member is involved in trying to research various political wrongdoings in our country. I for one am wishing him well. I will post to this blog the articles he sends me.

Myron

Relationships: Kurtis and Brenda

KURTIS THE STOCK BOY
AND
BRENDA THE CHECKOUT GIRL


In a supermarket, Kurtis the stock boy, was busily working when a new voice
came over the loud speaker asking for a carry out at register 4. Kurtis was
almost finished, and wanted to get some fresh air, and decided to answer the
call. As he approached the check-out stand a distant smile caught his eye, the
new check-out girl was beautiful. She was an older woman (maybe 26, and he was
only 22) and he fell in love.

Later that day, after his shift was over, he waited by the punch clock to find
out her name. She came into the break room, smiled softly at him, took her card
and punched out, then left. He looked at her card, BRENDA. He walked out only
to see her start walking up the road. Next day, he waited outside as she left
the supermarket, and offered her a ride home. He looked harmless enough, and she
accepted. When he dropped her off, he asked if maybe he could see her again,
outside of work. She simply said it wasn't possible.

He pressed and she explained she had two children and she couldn't afford a
baby-sitter, so he offered to pay for the baby-sitter. Reluctantly she accepted
his offer for a date for the following Saturday. That Saturday night he arrived
at her door only to have her tell him that she was unable to go with him. The
baby-sitter had called and canceled. To which Kurtis simply said, "Well,
let's take the kids with us."

She tried to explain that taking the children was not an option, but again not
taking no for an answer, he pressed. Finally Brenda, brought him inside to meet
her children. She had an older daughter who was just as cute as a bug, Kurtis
thought, then Brenda brought out her son, in a wheelchair. He was born a
paraplegic with Down Syndrome.

Kurtis asked Brenda, "I still don't understand why the kids can't
come with us?" Brenda was amazed. Most men would run away from a woman
with two kids, especially if one had disabilities - just like her first husband
and father of her children had done. Kurtis was not ordinary - - - he had a
different mindset.

That evening Kurtis and Brenda loaded up the kids, went to dinner and the
movies. When her son needed anything Kurtis would take care of him. When he
needed to use the restroom, he picked him up out of his wheelchair, took him and
brought him back. The kids loved Kurtis. At the end of the evening, Brenda
knew this was the man she was going to marry and spend the rest of her life
with.

A year later, they were married and Kurtis adopted both of her children.
Since then they have added two more kids.

So what happened to Kurtis the stock boy and Brenda the check-out girl? Well,
Mr. & Mrs. Kurt Warner now live in Arizona , where he is currently employed
as the quarterback of the National Football League Arizona Cardinals and has his
Cardinals in the hunt for a possible appearance in the Super Bowl. Is this a
surprise ending or could you have guessed that he was not an ordinary person.

It should be noted that he also quarterbacked the Rams in Super Bowl XXXVI. He has also been the NLF's Most Valuable Player twice and the Super Bowl's Most Valuable Player.

NOTE: copy/pasted from email .. myron@myownfaith2.com

My First Post




Hello bloggers:

This blog site will be used to the glory of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

I plan to post various articles from the web pertaining to our world.

Join us if you so desire. I'll help you with the technical details.

GOD BLESS

Myron Holter
5112 SW 33rd ST
Topeka KS 66614

785-272-4986 (h)

myron@myownfaith2.com (w)